Difference between revisions of "Alma/Personal Logs"

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== language, human cognition ==
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only one leaf leaped up and looped back to the ground
  
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she has an undergrad degree in psychology, focusing on cognitive and biopyschology. she became more narrowly focused in grad school on animal cognition and intelligence. Her insights in to human behavior are less grounded than insights in to behavioral ecology and, in particular, corvids. she does shallow lit searches in psychology about humans because it is interesting to her but imagine a well-educated person losing touch with this topic but coming back to it recently in the past six or so months due to being confronted with humanity again.
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----
  
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in her notebooks: ''jargon? vocabulary? missing words. colonized language. colonized minds. anger and acceptance?'' with a new annotation followed some other day perhaps caused by some conversation: ''WTF ZACH fuck you magic blah blah blah you don't know'' followed by DOIs if she's being lazy and tired of scrawling, or by full titles with DOIs if she is not.
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Alma is forlorn that she doesn't get to talk to James to share with him the
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joy of the idea that you can talk to things in the world and then hear what
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they have to say if you listen really hard (''dramatic irony'') Alma met James while she was communing with the universe and sending love out to the trees and the ground and everything. And then this person is walking
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around and says Sycamore.
  
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* [https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/28068125 Our Moral Choices Are Foreign to Us]
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and she's high on life and thinking, if only everyone knew! and then
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* [http://journals.plos.org/plosone/article?id=10.1371/journal.pone.0094842 Your Morals Depend on Language]
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this person sort of knows and she wishes she could let him really know. I mean,
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* She almost applied to the Choice Blindness group at Lund University but fell in love at almost first site when meeting people at the corvid cognition station and in particular, None, an experimental subject who lives in an aviary. but here are some papers from the choice blindness group. She shallowly follows their research
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really. really really know." and then they say the most amazing cool thing. and it's even a lesson
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** [http://journals.plos.org/plosone/article?id=10.1371/journal.pone.0045457# Lifting the Veil of Morality: Choice Blindness and Attitude Reversals on a Self-Transforming Survey]
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to her.
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** [https://twitter.com/ChoiceBlindness/status/577735423700635648/photo/1 @ChoiceBlindness] Our new paper in PNAS. We show how moral decisions can be biased by exploiting gaze patterns
 
  
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== misreadings ==
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She's noisy, and they say listen.
  
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Alma often reads meaning in to things that don't actually relate as a common mistake in her practice. She often carries books with her in her duffel bag or pockets. the books have bookmarks, paper inserts with notes, and underlining with annotations. (This makes her player cringe). She has confirmation bias when she finds snippets and meaning in things that fit with what she imagines to be better than the doctrine of her tradition.
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Alma is very noisy and babbles to the world; James ''listens''
  
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but I'm sure sometimes she accidentally stumbles on a real truth, but who knows, really? I mean, really?
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(Raven gallery: Jim listens. The problem is he repeats what he hears.)
  
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=== Robinson Jeffers ===
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----
  
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In pencil under his name: ''called an occidental? pantheist.''
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"I know my tools. I know theirs. I can see decades in time. I just made
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it harder." She bursts in to tears because she knows how much she can't do
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right now. "What if they blame you? You're not the seed. I /am/. I don't
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fucking need you to push me anywhere. No one can fucking push me anywhere. I
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don't always know why I push back--it's taken me a long time to understand why
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I pushed back on them so much. fuck them. I love them, but fuck them anyway.
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They better fucking believe me. The better fucking beleive me when I say what I
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think is stronger than any fucking promise. The promise is an accident. it is a
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fucking coincidence! If I don't do what I tell them then I'm not me and I'm
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dead!"
  
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Flight of Swans<br />
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----
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Robinson Jeffers<br />
 
  
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One who sees giant Orion, the torches of winter midnight,<br />
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"We--They...No, me. I feel a calling that is part of my being to guard the world and all people in it. I feel a calling to witness the world and all people in it because if I don't see things as they are then I cannot understand them. Worse, I won't be able to understand consequences. Ultimately, I feel a calling to make those in authority /understand/ consequences. truly understand. Mistakes at this scale--Mistakes would be horrible. Horror. They would lead to Horror. All of this goes beyond any oath. If this calling ever changes then you should consider destroying whatever thing is walking around in this shell because it won't be me." She soften a moment, "Or, at least talk to them first, see if they are a person. and they don't have to be saints or anything. No one does." She looks at him, in all earnest. Perhaps even more earnest than Jim.
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Enormously walking above the ocean in the west of heaven;<br />
 
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And watches the track of this <u>age of time</u> at its peak <u>of flight</u><br />
 
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Waver like a spent rocket, wavering towards new discoveries,<br />
 
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<u>Mortal examinations</u> of darkness, <u>soundings of depth</u>;<br />
 
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And watches the long coast mountain <u>vibrate from bronze to green</u>,<br />
 
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Bronze to green, year after year, and all the streams<br />
 
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Dry and flooded, dry and flooded, in the racing seasons;<br />
 
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And knows that <u>exactly this and not another is the world</u>,<br />
 
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The ideal is phantoms for bait, the spirit is a flicker on a grave;--<br />
 
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May <u>serve</u>, with a certain detachment, the fugitive human race,<br />
 
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Or his own people, or <u>his own household</u>; but hardly himself;<br />
 
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And will <u>not</u> wind himself into hopes nor sicken with despairs.<br />
 
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He has found the peace and adored the God; he <u>handles in autumn<br />
 
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The germs of far-future spring</u>.<br />
 
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&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;
 
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&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;
 
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&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;
 
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&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;
 
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Sad sons of the stormy fall,<br />
 
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No escape, you have to <u>inflict and endure</u>; surely it is time for you<br />
 
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To learn to touch the <u>diamond</u> within to the diamond outside,<br />
 
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Thinning your humanity a little between the invulnerable diamonds,<br />
 
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Knowing that your angry choices and hopes and terrors are in vain,<br />
 
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But life and death <u>not in vain</u>; and the world <u>is</u> like a flight of swans.<br />
 
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<br />
 
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<br />
 
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* interspersed throughout this page are underlines and arrows to notes and comments, for examples
 
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** <u>Swans</u>, like what you really see in nature not what stories say
 
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** ''which age''? ''time'' ''parabola! not just circles. all the cycles and shapes and paths''? <u>'''WHY CIRCLES'''</u>
 
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** inflict and endure - does this mean no escape and no choice for death. is it <u>just</u>?
 
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** diamond sutra?
 
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** no escape from jhor? '''NO''' maybe we are saved with nature and swans and the living world
 
  
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There are more notes but the player doesn't want to go on and on here. Imagine a kid who missed a well rounded humanities education cramming for a very final exam and not applying a sophisticated well-informed sensibility to things due to a lack of grounding.
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----
  
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== some reverse chronological things ==
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illusion of explanatory depth
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* Alma contacts her mentor to to catch up and mention that, no shit, she met a Raven. Oh btw, What is the unmaking? Also, we will experiment with Time and Space. (nothing could possibly go wrong)
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** No word from None, but she learned from Jim that this thing is basically like Gozer. Hmm, ok. She can grasp that. From her point of view it's like the heat death of the universe.
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----
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''"The ecosystem itself is not just a landscape full of plant and animal species; it’s an intricate network of relationships, including those between predators and their prey, between flowering plants and their pollinators, between fruiting plants and the animals that disperse their seeds. Each such relationship constitutes a link between trophic levels."''
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Hardin's First Law of Human Ecology: "We can never do merely one thing. Any intrusion into nature has numerous effects, many of which are unpredictable."
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"I have no doubt that in reality the future will be vastly more surprising than anything I can imagine. Now my own suspicion is that the Universe is not only queerer than we suppose, but queerer than we ''can'' suppose." J. B. S. Haldane
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[https://medium.com/@nayafia/an-alternate-ending-to-the-tragedy-of-the-commons-446b4e960887 An alternate ending to the tragedy of the commons]: "My big takeaway from the patterns Ostrom identified is that sustainably managing the commons requires a high degree of context among participants. Most failure outcomes can be traced back to context collapse."
 +
 
 +
[https://www.forbes.com/sites/grrlscientist/2018/07/19/meet-the-invasive-insect-that-is-changing-an-entire-forest-bird-community/#1f2acac3bfad Meet The Invasive Insect That Is Changing An Entire Forest Bird Community]:
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"With anything related to ecology, you don’t really understand the potentially far-reaching effects of taking pieces out of the system," Mr. Toenies explained. "The interactions between species and their environments is so complex that you can’t take something out, like an entire species, and fully understand the effects of it."
 +
 
 +
 
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[https://abstrusegoose.com/589 Flight of the Good Idea]

Latest revision as of 12:24, 2 February 2019

only one leaf leaped up and looped back to the ground

Alma is forlorn that she doesn't get to talk to James to share with him the joy of the idea that you can talk to things in the world and then hear what they have to say if you listen really hard (dramatic irony) Alma met James while she was communing with the universe and sending love out to the trees and the ground and everything. And then this person is walking around and says Sycamore.

and she's high on life and thinking, if only everyone knew! and then this person sort of knows and she wishes she could let him really know. I mean, really. really really know." and then they say the most amazing cool thing. and it's even a lesson to her.

She's noisy, and they say listen.

Alma is very noisy and babbles to the world; James listens

(Raven gallery: Jim listens. The problem is he repeats what he hears.)

"I know my tools. I know theirs. I can see decades in time. I just made it harder." She bursts in to tears because she knows how much she can't do right now. "What if they blame you? You're not the seed. I /am/. I don't fucking need you to push me anywhere. No one can fucking push me anywhere. I don't always know why I push back--it's taken me a long time to understand why I pushed back on them so much. fuck them. I love them, but fuck them anyway. They better fucking believe me. The better fucking beleive me when I say what I think is stronger than any fucking promise. The promise is an accident. it is a fucking coincidence! If I don't do what I tell them then I'm not me and I'm dead!"

"We--They...No, me. I feel a calling that is part of my being to guard the world and all people in it. I feel a calling to witness the world and all people in it because if I don't see things as they are then I cannot understand them. Worse, I won't be able to understand consequences. Ultimately, I feel a calling to make those in authority /understand/ consequences. truly understand. Mistakes at this scale--Mistakes would be horrible. Horror. They would lead to Horror. All of this goes beyond any oath. If this calling ever changes then you should consider destroying whatever thing is walking around in this shell because it won't be me." She soften a moment, "Or, at least talk to them first, see if they are a person. and they don't have to be saints or anything. No one does." She looks at him, in all earnest. Perhaps even more earnest than Jim.

illusion of explanatory depth

"The ecosystem itself is not just a landscape full of plant and animal species; it’s an intricate network of relationships, including those between predators and their prey, between flowering plants and their pollinators, between fruiting plants and the animals that disperse their seeds. Each such relationship constitutes a link between trophic levels."

Hardin's First Law of Human Ecology: "We can never do merely one thing. Any intrusion into nature has numerous effects, many of which are unpredictable."

"I have no doubt that in reality the future will be vastly more surprising than anything I can imagine. Now my own suspicion is that the Universe is not only queerer than we suppose, but queerer than we can suppose." J. B. S. Haldane

An alternate ending to the tragedy of the commons: "My big takeaway from the patterns Ostrom identified is that sustainably managing the commons requires a high degree of context among participants. Most failure outcomes can be traced back to context collapse."

Meet The Invasive Insect That Is Changing An Entire Forest Bird Community: "With anything related to ecology, you don’t really understand the potentially far-reaching effects of taking pieces out of the system," Mr. Toenies explained. "The interactions between species and their environments is so complex that you can’t take something out, like an entire species, and fully understand the effects of it."


Flight of the Good Idea

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